so lucky

I am so lucky. I am so lucky. Will you look at this picture? The gifts of 2009 are so glorious. There was struggle, but oh, the gifts. I have been tasteful, and I have not done a silly internet blabber about how awesome Rusty is, but he is so awesome, I could write volumes. About how he is a perfectly complementary being to my being. About how when we get on video chat and he just make faces at me for ten minutes, I am in paradise.

On a contrasting note, there is a lot of pain happening for a lot of my dear friends right now, and I am not sure what's up with that. I was feeling hella out of whack right along with them, until I painted half a wall and decided firmly that I must return to the basics of my artmaking. Craft projects and loud music and journal musing. It's been good. But I want the pain to ease for my pals, and for the holidays not to hurt.

Brother (another gift in my life) invited me to come to a taping of Artists Den (a PBS series) that his Dad's company was doing the video for. It was a very very intimate Tori Amos show at the Park Avenue Armory - which is, by the way, the effing COOLEST place, all huge and old and beautiful and carved out of everything. And Tori! Who knew! I have a couple of her albums, and have been known to fall into a Tori period from time to time. When I am feeling like I need to wrench something very primal and feminine out of my guts. I've never seen any live footage of her, so her performance came as a total shock to me. In my head, she's a voice, and some red hair. In person? Holy moly. She didn't talk - said maybe two words the whole set. No matter. She sucked us all in. She held us, toyed with us, flirted and wailed, and whispered and beckoned and by the end of it, I had goosebumps and hovering tears. Arresting - disarming - wholly engrossing, is Ms. Amos. It was very inspiring. Many thanks to Brother.

There were stars in our murky city sky tonight. Real stars.